I’d be lying if I were to say the past twelve months haven’t done a number on my social skills. No longer do I meet up with a friend for morning coffee; no longer does my neighbor pop in for a beer. Virtual visitations with my son, his wife, and my beloved granddaughter leave a lot to be desired. Like me, they’ve been living under house arrest since the pandemic arrived and shut us off, one from another. That is, except for my wife and fellow inmate Anne.
Last evening, as we sat staring at the walls, it suddenly occurred to us that we’ve been married now for fifty years. Neither of us can remember the exact date; however, the consensus is that the ceremony took place in her parents’ living room in the later part of February, 1971. Officiating was Judge Julien Hyer, father of the film actress Martha Hyer—I remember that much. I also remember handing the judge an envelope containing fifty dollars, which was quite a lot of money at the time. Afterwards, we two set off on our honeymoon. Tucked into my backpack was a paperback guidebook: MEXICO ON FIVE DOLLARS A DAY.
“We should celebrate, don’t you think?” asked Anne. I agreed, but how? Going out to dinner was out of the question; however, after some deliberation it was decided that I could venture out by myself, provided I wore two facemasks and didn’t step out of my car.
First thing I noticed was that just about all the restaurants in our neighborhood had re-opened and were teeming with customers. Hell, even the Blue Boutique was open. Briefly, I pulled to the curb and stared at a show window filled with mannequins wearing skimpy outfits. Now, I don’t take selfies, but I imagine I looked very much like the elderly gentleman I photographed thirty years ago who stood transfixed by the sight of an ancient steam locomotive.
I moved on. Clearly, the Blue Boutique is not for me, and frankly, I’m not sure how it works for anyone nowadays.
“What did you buy, Sweetie?”
“A French maid outfit with fishnet stockings.”
“Ooh La La! Come over here, Baby.”
“Hey, keep your distance!”
Our favorite Greek drive-thru Yanni’s was open, so I drove through. Later, Anne and I “celebrated” our Golden Wedding Anniversary at home, just the two of us, sharing a plate of souvlakis, dolmathes, and deep-fried mushrooms.
“We should probably have done more,” said my bride afterwards.
“The Blue Boutique is open,” I said.
“You’ve GOT to be joking!”